Save me from myself {OPEN}

[Spuds]

Murder! She Wrote

Illuminated Paper....

The last chills of winter, pricked at my silky black hide.
The season had changed to Spring, but this graveyard was resisting to let go of winter. It was of no concern to me. I have never held a preference to one season more than another. What does it really matter? I can't control the seasons. I can't control anything in my life anymore, it seems. I shouldn't say "anymore". For I know not if I was ever in control over my life. I cannot recall such a time. But in fact, I cannot recall anything of my past.

Caressed by a Flame...

The silvery grey shadows of the night, ran along the outline of my graceful Arabian bodice. The ominous voice of the wind, whispered suicidal thoughts in my ears. It was trying to persuade me again. Why is my life consumed by thoughts of death? Will my death be filled with thoughts of life? Or will I finally be able to rest in peace?
Peace? I filtered through my boggled brain, searching for the exact definition of that word. I have heard it many times before. I have heard others boast about having it. But I haven't the slightest idea on how to obtain it. I have a vague idea on what the general idea behind it is, but I'm pretty sure I've never experienced it. Any yet, I desire it greatly.

My Psychotic Mind...

I shuffled my hooves along the hard ground. I stepped on brown leaves, that were still damp from the snow that had blanketed them for the past three months. My black orbs, that much resembled charcoals, looked around with interest. My eyes befell piles of bones. No doubt from previous visitors, that had roamed this region. Maybe one of the piles will be me, soon. Dang, there I went again. Back to my thoughts of suicide. I shook my head, for I knew what was coming. That voice within my head would pipe up. And so it did. It was a female voice, and if I were to describe it in one word, I would describe it as eerie. It tries to talk sweetly, but it is merely sugar coated hatred. "Now now, Dear. Don't be that way. You aren't happy to hear from me?" No, leave me alone for once! "That hurt. Don't be spiteful. I'm here to help you." What do you care. "I've come to grant your heart's one true desire..." And what might that be? " Eternal peace. I can offer you peace, in just a few, easy steps." I tried my best to ignore the voice, but I couldn't help myself. I was intrigued. The voice sensed this, and continued. "See that incline over there?" I nodded. "Go a little farther and look at what's below." I complied, and I was soon peering over the edge. "There's rocks below....very sharp rocks. Now all you have to do...is jump. And it will all be over before you know it, and you'll have peace." Won't that hurt? "No, not at all, darling" The voice cooed. Why do you want me dead? I don't think I can trust you. "I'm only telling you this for your own good, you wretched, ungrateful little brat!" The voice exploded.
I recognized that voice...but I couldn't place it.
Where have I heard it? I wondered. Tell me who you are. I demanded. "That is no concern of yours!" The voice then cooed once more. "Just....Jump my dear. You'll never know unless you try..."
I stood there, staring at the jagged rocks below. It wasn't very far down, but I was pretty sure it would bring death. I stood there, all through the night. Hours on end. Morning was almost here, now. "You've been stalling!" The voice reprimanded me. "JUMP! NOW!"
I took one tentative step towards the edge. Then another...and another. I took a deep breath, and prepared to jump.

Will Never be the Same (c)

Words: 652 [825 Including Tags]
Muse: Awesome
Notes: Feel free to reply! Open to As Many People As Want To Reply!!

[Kiyuo_Honoo]

Sumire

His hooves thundered as he galloped across the dreary land that would scare most. But Sumire had seen worst and wasn't worried about anything. Slowing to a walk the large stallion paused at seeing a black mare, her frame was strange to him.

He walked forward, noticing how he towered over her easily, "Madam? Are you alright?"

A simple question, but one that would make her stray away from the egde of the cliff. His purple orbs were trained to the black fae, awaiting for her to reply and back away from the edge.

The wind echoed within Sumire's ears and whiped his mane and tail as it blew with a strong force. His purple eyes stayed on the fae, awaiting her to reply and back away. If need be he would move in font of her and back her up.

Words: 143
Notes: Longer now. Thanks for letting me know it was to short.

[Spuds]

Murder! She Wrote

Illuminated Paper....

I stared trans-fixedly at the rocks below. The words of the voice, masked the sound of galloping hooves. "A little farther, Dear." I took another step, though my hoof only moved forward about an inch. "You're almost there!" The voice encouraged me on. With the next step I took, my hoof landed on the edge, and made me start to lose my balance. I jerked back, startled. My eyes flashed wildly and I snorted. I reared, and was about to go with my first instinct: Flee. But the voice had other ideas. "Calm down. You almost had it. Try it again." The voice was uncharacteristically soothing.

Caressed by a Flame...

I started the slow process again, with small, tentative steps. But I stopped, when I heard a voice say, "Madam? Are you alright?" "Ignore that. That's just a voice in your head." But aren't you just a voice in my head, also? The voice paused, as if mystified on how to answer. "I'm a different kind of voice. The one you listen to....Your Conscience" You don't seem like a conscience to me. "If I say I am you conscience then I am your conscience! Got it?! Besides, you wouldn't know a conscience if you slammed into one!" Look who's got their tail in a knot. I said snarkily, via thought. I giggled out loud, about her remark of me not knowing a conscience if I slammed into one. "We're off topic." The voice said, in a huff. "Now where were we? Oh yes. You're about to gain eternal peace. But you can't do that if you keep talking...I have a good mind not to let you have eternal peace now.." NO! Don't do that! Please. "Alright. I'll give you another chance. Now, step a little closer to the edge, and jump."

My Psychotic Mind...

I obeyed, and stepped to the edge once more. The voice egged me on. But something was nagging at the back of my mind. The fact that the voice was now so joyously giddy. Why would the voice be so happy about my obtaining peace? I shook my head in frustration. Finally the voice shut up for a minute, so I could think. I heard a noise next to me, and was reminded of the other voice I had heard, the masculine one. It had only spoken a couple minutes ago, though it seemed like an eternity already. I decided to look and see for myself. So I tore my gaze from the jaggad rocks, and moved my head slowly to the side. This angered the feminine voice, and she started whispering things to me, which made the color drain from my face, and make me pale. I looked at the stallion, my eyes confused, but my face revealing no emotion. I stared at him, much in the same way I had at the rocks. I seemed to be frozen in place, and my mind seemed to be asleep.

Finally my mind began cooperating. It processed my thoughts, though still not very quickly. I began noticing things. Such as the fact that this was a real stallion standing before me -- not a voice in my head, like I had been told. He had eyes of purple, that highly contrasted with this grey, bleak landscape. I couldn't recall the last time I had seen that color. The only colors I ever saw were Black, white, grey, and most of all....Red.

The feminine voice, which I have decided to address as Donya, had a panicked note in her voice. "Send him away, Ra--" He will ruin your chances at peace!! Jump now, before it's too late!" What had the voice started to say, then stopped Abruptly? Ra....? Oh well, guess it doesn't really matter. I parted my velvet black lips, and spoke to the black stallion. "It's time for you to leave. You're detaining me from my awaiting peace." I said, in a monotonous voice. I then turned my head from the stallion, and started walking forward, determinedly.

Will Never be the Same (c)

Words: 667 [851 including tags]
Muse: Awesome, still.
Notes:

[Kiyuo_Honoo]

Sumire

"And before you fall to enternal sleep will you feel such agony as everything is torn and broken. The fear of the fall before you slam against the ragged rocks."

Sumire truly had no idea what he said as he never felt such things but it was one thing to just watch someone jump to their deaths and another to stop them.

How could he just watch her jump without trying to stop her. Some sadistic ones might have tried to encourage her but he wasn't like that.

"What would you rather have dear mistress? Agonizing pain before enternal sleep or a path that would bring you peace that could be close to enternity?"

Not being one for words, Sumire knew that physically pushing her away would cause trouble so he spoke, not moving from where he stood but he did keep his purple eyes upon the mare.

Words: 160

[Spuds]

Murder! She Wrote

Illuminated Paper....

And before you fall to enternal sleep will you feel such agony as everything is torn and broken. The fear of the fall before you slam against the ragged rocks.
My hooves danced in place. I snorted, in anger. You said it wouldn't hurt! You lied to me. "It won't! He doesn't know what he's talking about! Look at him, he's never jumped before! So how would he know! He is just trying to keep you from gaining eternal peace. Don't let me stop you from getting the peace you deserve!"
I shook my slim, defined Arabian head out in disgust. Feeling torn between the stranger and Donya.
Donya was talking so loudly and so quickly, it caused me to have a headache. The raging, yet oddly silent sound combined with the throbbing pain kept me from thinking clearly. "Come now, Dear. Don't let him confuse you. You're making it so much more complicated than it really is. You are both confusing me.
"Just block his sound out. Just concentrate on what really matters. Peaceeee" Donya drawled out the word, as she let out a breath.

Caressed by a Flame...

Peaceee. Yes, you're right Donya. That's what really matters. Yes. That's my girl. Donya praised me, with an affectionate, satisfied voice. I began to block out the stallions words. But before I could silence my ears, his words once more caught my attention.
'What would you rather have dear mistress? Agonizing pain before enternal sleep or a path that would bring you peace that could be close to enternity?'
Eternal sleep? I had never thought of it as sleep. I have mixed feelings when it comes to sleep. Sleep can rejuvenate, yes. My my sleep is often plagued by nightmares. And nightmares are even worse than reality in mot cases. Sleep is a chance. I don't like chances. What if my eternal sleep is one eternal nightmare?
And what was the other thing he had said? He had basically said I had a choice, though in other words. He asked me what I would rather have...A path that would bring me peace that could be close to eternity? What could he possibly mean by that? Was there a way to be happy without dying?
All these questions bogging down my already muddled, and pain filled skull, was not fun.



This is my land! Go get your own!

My Psychotic Mind...

"Tell me." I demanded. "What is this path leading to peace, in this life, that you speak of? How is once to go about capturing it? NO! Don't give in to him. He knows what you want, so he's just telling you what you want to hear so he can have control over you!" You seem to be an expert on his plan. Why is that? "I--I--I just...know his type. They're always trouble, and want to hurt you. You can't offer you what you want. It doesn't exist in this life. I am the only one that has power over peace. And I told you how to get it. Jump! Don't waste you time and energy on this rogue stallion! I'm warning you! Heed my warning, or you'll regret it!!" Oh get off your high horse! If I hadn't been in the situation I was in, that remark I made would have cracked me up. Considering Donya is in my head, and I'm a rather tall equine.
I kept my chocolate eyes fixated on the rogue stallion, waiting eagerly for him to answer my questions. Don't get your hopes up...remember what Donya said. Wait, why do I listen to Donya? I hadn't the faintest idea. I don't even remember a time without her. She's been with me for at least the last year. I can only remember one year back. Before that, everything's a mystery. Oh well. Must not have been very important, if I don't remember it. If horses could shrug, I would have just then.
My nares flared, as I took in the scent of the stallion. I was trying to place where he had come from, but I did not recognize the scent. I have traveled a lot of the surrounding lands, but nothing ever interested me enough to make one my home. I just wandered around aimlessly, in my own, bleak little world. Where the color palette consisted of only a few select colors, and not much meaning was placed on anything particular. Where life is merely what you have to put up with, before you get to rest. What is the point of life, anyways? I often wonder.

Will Never be the Same (c)

Words: 754! [929 including tags]
Muse: Great!
Notes:

[Kiyuo_Honoo]

The Arabian argued with herself for quite some time, if someone else had tried to stop her they would most likely grown impatient at her but Sumire wasn't one of them.

The large stag was considered the calmest most have met and he waited, just watching the fae for her reactions. Then she spoke, "Tell me." She demanded. "What is this path leading to peace, in this life, that you speak of? How is once to go about capturing it?"

He spoke to her, "It is impossible to capture peace in a short amount of time. Time must pass and hardships must be plowed through to achieve the peace you wish for." His eyes glowed eerily as the sunlight hit the purple depths. "Shall you work for the peace you wish for, it shall be granted in time."

If she called him a liar, she would be lying, for he had never lied, it wasn't in his blood to tell a lie. He always told the truth and accepted his punishment for anything he did wrong.

If she continued to wish for eternal sleep, he would show her how she would end up. The scent of blood still fresh in his nares and the sight seared into his brain.

Words: 215
Muse: Seeping back
Notes: ---

[Spuds]

Murder! She Wrote

Illuminated Paper....

It is impossible to capture peace in a short amount of time. Time must pass and hardships must be plowed through to achieve the peace you wish for.
What little dose of hope I had left, was now crushed. Disappointment was quite visible as I seemed to almost wilt. I wanted a quick fix solution for happiness. I was sick of my life. Sick of waiting, hoping -- even praying for blessings to fall from the heavens and fill my life with joy.

Caressed by a Flame...

"Ha! You see. Not to rub it in but...I told you so!"
Shut up Donya! Just. Shut. Up.
Shall you work for the peace you wish for, it shall be granted in time.
"Time! Everything takes time! I could toil my flesh and grind my bones to powder and it would never be enough to deserve it. Who am I trying to kid...There is no easy-way-out."
"That's right! Tell him like it is!

My Psychotic Mind...

I felt the urge to run, run like the wind. Maybe if I ran fast enough, I would break through the layers of the earth and be in a new world. A custom world. Where everyone was in control of their life, and kept to themselves. Minding their own business, with nothing in their minds, and no voices in their heads. "Hey! I resent that."
I know that sounds ridiculous, but wouldn't that be lovely if it were real? Reality is so bothersome.

Will Never be the Same (c)

Words: Don't even want to know
Muse: Bleh
Notes: What now?